Sunday, July 03, 2005

4th of July - Paso Robles Style

Return of the Nubian Princess

So I'm soaking up the glorious rays of San Luis Obispo County in "the best kept secret" town of Paso Robles. My boyfriend's parents have built themselves the most wonderful hideaway about 5 miles or so away from downtown Paso Robles. The last time I was in PR was 2004, as a volunteer for Aids Lifecycle - a 7-day cycling event to raise funds and awareness for HIV/AIDS. It was particularly cold at that time but the weather has switched abruptly and it's 92 degrees during the day and 56 degrees at night. I couldn't believe the miles of land between homes, the calm that settles over you as you listen closely and only hear the buzz of bees, flies and their dog Katie barking off in the distance. It is amazing out here. We drove into town and visited Russell's Aunt Doots, who lives with her pup and hates gardening and unpacking as much as I do! hehehe...she's great. We all shared a very delicious meal out on the patio last night under the stars, smoking cigars (and my ciggie) after dinner. Chatter, laughter and poking fun at each other was the theme of the evening. I just read an article about the issue of restraining orders in this nation - they obviously only protect those who are not in critical danger which leaves those who are in a serious situation. It looks like they are dragging their feet to do something about it but at least the topic is out in the open - as it has been for years but - I can't be cynical - times have changed since the rule of thumb law...

Russell's mother Robin said that she couldn't believe that this violence existed: I just remember the love. Yeah, I hear her completely. Where is the love? It's still there, we just don't hear about it as often as I would like.

This 4th of July, the theme should be love, admist the war and death toll in Iraq, (for an update check out:
- a site run by academics and peace activists), and the fight for civil liberties, we should give everyone a big fucking hug and say I love you.

Tomorrow is not promised as I learned Saturday morning. My sweet grandmother, (really my half-brother's mother), Lois, passed away - leaving a family at a loss for words. She was undeniably wonderful to me, kind and sweet despite having been married to my mysogynistic-philandering-wife-beating-father. She lost my brother Bernard to AIDS, she lost her youngest son Christopher to a gun-shot wound in Richmond, CA. I was not surprised to hear that she was gone. How could someone live through that? My mother never really survived the loss of her youngest Gregory. I have not spoken to my family yet but I dread going home to make that phone call to my mom, who was close to Lois and my brother and sister, Jerome and Jackie. I have no idea how they must be feeling. Especially Jackie, who went through some issues with her mother and brother Jerome in the last year following my brother Bernard's death. I'm meditating for the best. But with death, comes healing and growth, I hope this holiday weekend will be healing for myself and everyone.


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